I recently saw a video on Facebook, it was an ad, that posed the question "What do you want to be when you grow up?" They posed the question to adults from all walks of life and ages. The reactions varied from surprised to incredulous at being asked such a question. In the end, though, everyone gave an answer that reflected dreams thought up by innocent children.
I thoroughly enjoy asking people this question. I always do my best to ask it in the present tense and not past tense. When you are asked "what did you want to be when you grew up" vs. "what do you want to be when you grow up", it insinuates that you have already missed your chance to be that thing. As if the opportunity to become what you dreamed about has already passed you by.
When I have the opportunity to meet someone new, especially if they identify as female, this is literally one of the first questions I ask.
I don't ask if they have children if they are married, what their spouse does, or anything resembling a "normal conversation starter". I start off with "what do you want to be when you grow up". That is usually followed up with why and how does that make you feel, depending on the person's answer.
Starting the conversation this way cuts through the fluff and lets the other person know I'm interested in learning about them as a whole human rather than only chatting about the surface stuff. There is definitely a time and a place for the surface conversations and asking about the "titles", but I love jumping into what they are feeling and what they want to be feeling.
The conversation that follows has been varied and wonderful. Rich deep friendships have resulted and I still maintain those relationships today.
Questions to help you discern what this looks like...
I would love to know what is coming up for you right now! Leave a comment below or pop into the messenger bubble and let me know!
-Gael
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